The groom's speech: 10 tips to make it memorable

The groom speaks second at a traditional UK wedding, between the father of the bride and the best man. The structure is straightforward: thanks first, a few words about your partner second, a toast to the bridesmaids to finish.

These 10 tips cover what to say, what to cut, how long to go, and how to deliver it so the room stays with you.

1. Lead with thanks, in order

Both sets of parents first (yours and your partner's), then anyone who hosted or helped, then the best man and ushers, then the bridesmaids. Naming people in order keeps you on script and avoids forgetting anyone.

2. Save the personal section for the middle

After the thanks, talk about your partner. Two or three specific things, not a general tribute. Specific lands; general does not.

3. Aim for 5 to 10 minutes

Roughly 700 to 1,200 words spoken at a calm pace. Over 10 minutes loses the room.

4. Write it in your own voice

If you would never say "we are gathered here today", do not write it. Read the draft aloud. If it sounds like a different person, cut and rewrite.

5. One story per point, maximum

Pick the strongest. Stories that need three sentences of setup belong in the pub, not the speech.

6. Cut anything about exes

No exceptions. No "before [partner], I never thought...". The room will tense and you will lose your rhythm.

7. End with the toast to the bridesmaids

"Please stand and raise your glasses to the bridesmaids." Short, clear, and the cue for the best man to take over.

8. Print the speech, large type

Double-spaced, 14pt or larger, on numbered cards. Phones lock, batteries die, and the screen glare reads badly on photos.

9. Time it twice, out loud, standing up

Reading on the sofa is not the same as speaking. Time yourself standing, with pauses for laughs. Then cut anything that drags.

10. Pause more than feels natural

After every joke, after the personal section, before the toast. Pauses make the room lean in. Rushing flattens everything.

A short worked closing

I want to finish by thanking the bridesmaids. You have looked after [partner] all day, you look wonderful, and I know how much today means because of the work you put in. Please stand and raise your glasses: to the bridesmaids.

Related speeches reading

The groom sits between the father of the bride and the best man. To see how all three fit together, read the order of speeches at a wedding. Coordinate your material with the speaker who follows you using our best man speech guide, so you are not telling the same stories.